BMW Garage BMW Meets Register Today's Posts
BIMMERPOST Universal Forums Off-Topic Discussions Board    Ask a Black person anything? (Paul Mooney Style)

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      04-26-2016, 04:34 PM   #507
jtodd_fl
2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary
jtodd_fl's Avatar
6704
Rep
1,298
Posts

Drives: People crazy
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Florida

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
2015 F82 M4  [9.00]
2016 F87 M2  [0.00]
2011 E92 M3  [0.00]
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
And the fact that this Asian guy (me) can tell the difference between black Americans vs someone who is 2nd generation Ethiopian vs other kids who have immigrant parents from Africa. Like akon. Lol

I went to an an African/French wedding and I sat with the uncles and aunts. He asked me if I ate red meat I said yes so he passed raw chunks meat. Dip it in hot sauce and eat with bread straight up raw. With beer made with honey. It was pretty good. That's drastically different from fried chicken and gumbo lol
Very traditional... in fact... *puts on professor's robe*

That beer is called Mead. It is a traditional wedding beer in many cultures. Also, in many cultures, the father of the bride supplies the groom with this honey beer for a month (or moon) after the wedding (presumably he'll need it, amirite?)

And THAT, kids, is where we get the term "honeymoon".

(Also put on assless chaps, but cannot be seen under the professor's robe. I suspect most professors did this...)
__________________
This space for rent.

Last edited by jtodd_fl; 04-26-2016 at 06:14 PM..
Appreciate 1
      04-26-2016, 05:36 PM   #508
UncleWede
Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner
UncleWede's Avatar
United_States
17963
Rep
9,377
Posts

Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Oxnard, CA

iTrader: (0)

Where Are My Assless Chaps????!!!!!!!
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 05:46 PM   #509
1MOREMOD
-
1MOREMOD's Avatar
United_States
11817
Rep
23,187
Posts

Drives: Race car->
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: check your mirrors

iTrader: (5)

I'm wearing them to mow the lawn
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 05:48 PM   #510
jtodd_fl
2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary
jtodd_fl's Avatar
6704
Rep
1,298
Posts

Drives: People crazy
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Florida

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
2015 F82 M4  [9.00]
2016 F87 M2  [0.00]
2011 E92 M3  [0.00]
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD View Post
I'm wearing them to mow the lawn
At least tell me you have a riding mower?
__________________
This space for rent.
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 05:49 PM   #511
1MOREMOD
-
1MOREMOD's Avatar
United_States
11817
Rep
23,187
Posts

Drives: Race car->
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: check your mirrors

iTrader: (5)

Push.
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 06:02 PM   #512
UncleWede
Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner
UncleWede's Avatar
United_States
17963
Rep
9,377
Posts

Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Oxnard, CA

iTrader: (0)

and very low catcher, I presume
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 06:02 PM   #513
kprocivic
Lieutenant Colonel
kprocivic's Avatar
813
Rep
1,575
Posts

Drives: ecoboost s to the t
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: 92346

iTrader: (7)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD View Post
I'm wearing them to mow the lawn
i'd hit it bare.
__________________
2.0l ecosmackkaa
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 06:03 PM   #514
UncleWede
Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner
UncleWede's Avatar
United_States
17963
Rep
9,377
Posts

Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Oxnard, CA

iTrader: (0)

ASSLESS chaps because rocks on grass
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 07:07 PM   #515
M3 Number 86
Major General
3221
Rep
6,218
Posts

Drives: black m3
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: pasadena

iTrader: (1)

Quote:
Originally Posted by kprocivic
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3 Number 86 View Post
And the fact that this Asian guy (me) can tell the difference between black Americans vs someone who is 2nd generation Ethiopian vs other kids who have immigrant parents from Africa. Like akon. Lol

I went to an an African/French wedding and I sat with the uncles and aunts. He asked me if I ate red meat I said yes so he passed raw chunks meat. Dip it in hot sauce and eat with bread straight up raw. With beer made with honey. It was pretty good. That's drastically different from fried chicken and gumbo lol
i think most people can tell the difference with any race/nationality.
Even if no accent? Doubt most white people could of he was wearing a hoodie.
__________________
Appreciate 0
      04-26-2016, 09:08 PM   #516
ASBSECU E93
Know's a guy that know's a guy...
ASBSECU E93's Avatar
5637
Rep
1,905
Posts

Drives: 2010 335d; 2008 135i
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

iTrader: (5)

Does this link work...?

If so, you're welcome

http://www.cc.com/video-clips/s6ew40...k-people-pt--1
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
She stood there. Pointed a finger at me and laughed at me. That damn bitch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Poop shit, shit and poop. I'm mildly angry now.
Appreciate 1
      04-26-2016, 09:10 PM   #517
ASBSECU E93
Know's a guy that know's a guy...
ASBSECU E93's Avatar
5637
Rep
1,905
Posts

Drives: 2010 335d; 2008 135i
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

iTrader: (5)

...and you're welcome.....AGAIN

http://www.cc.com/video-clips/ycvwzl...k-people-pt--2
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
She stood there. Pointed a finger at me and laughed at me. That damn bitch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Poop shit, shit and poop. I'm mildly angry now.
Appreciate 0
      04-27-2016, 06:21 AM   #518
Verbiage
Dismembered Member
Verbiage's Avatar
Jamaica
3583
Rep
9,213
Posts

Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: DMV

iTrader: (6)

Quote:
Originally Posted by ASBSECU E93 View Post
Does this link work...?

If so, you're welcome

http://www.cc.com/video-clips/s6ew40...k-people-pt--1
You were the professor of African American studies, weren't you...
__________________

My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
Appreciate 0
      04-27-2016, 07:21 AM   #519
ASBSECU E93
Know's a guy that know's a guy...
ASBSECU E93's Avatar
5637
Rep
1,905
Posts

Drives: 2010 335d; 2008 135i
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

iTrader: (5)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Verbiage
Quote:
Originally Posted by ASBSECU E93 View Post
Does this link work...?

If so, you're welcome

http://www.cc.com/video-clips/s6ew40...k-people-pt--1
You were the professor of African American studies, weren't you...
Professor of Street knowledge
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
She stood there. Pointed a finger at me and laughed at me. That damn bitch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Poop shit, shit and poop. I'm mildly angry now.
Appreciate 0
      04-27-2016, 08:11 AM   #520
Aatish
Lofty
Aatish's Avatar
3458
Rep
849
Posts

Drives: i4 M50, 991.2 C2, RRS Diesel
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: ORD <> ATX

iTrader: (0)

Appreciate 0
      04-27-2016, 07:34 PM   #521
M3 Number 86
Major General
3221
Rep
6,218
Posts

Drives: black m3
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: pasadena

iTrader: (1)

Here's my nice African plate.
Attached Images
 
__________________
Appreciate 1
      04-27-2016, 11:35 PM   #522
ASBSECU E93
Know's a guy that know's a guy...
ASBSECU E93's Avatar
5637
Rep
1,905
Posts

Drives: 2010 335d; 2008 135i
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

iTrader: (5)

beane pie anyone..?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
She stood there. Pointed a finger at me and laughed at me. That damn bitch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Poop shit, shit and poop. I'm mildly angry now.
Appreciate 0
      05-02-2016, 08:52 PM   #523
F30lolz
I can haz cheezburger?
F30lolz's Avatar
6799
Rep
3,677
Posts

Drives: 14 Sahara/08 335xi/22 Maverick
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Miami, FL/Shelbyville, IN

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Ever take another man's cornbread?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by RaptorKTM View Post
Also our E90 330 and 325 will soon have some sort of boost. So there is actually more of a chance to get more hp out of a 330 then a 335 in my opinion
Appreciate 0
      05-02-2016, 09:01 PM   #524
iron_man
do you even lift?
iron_man's Avatar
108
Rep
311
Posts

Drives: M5 Competition
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: New Oorleans

iTrader: (0)

Do black guys not like when black girls date a white guy?
__________________
08 E92 M3 l Jet Black l C/F roof l 6speed l Technology Package l Megan Racing axleback
Appreciate 0
      05-02-2016, 10:01 PM   #525
ASBSECU E93
Know's a guy that know's a guy...
ASBSECU E93's Avatar
5637
Rep
1,905
Posts

Drives: 2010 335d; 2008 135i
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

iTrader: (5)

Verbiage - True story....

I lived in a RURAL and economically depressed area of Eastern NC for a little while when i was about 7 years old. When I say RURAL....I mean Egypt adjacent!!

Our neighbors (A large family of black tobacco farmers) lived in the house down the road from us. We had a couple of large dogs (100 lb Black Lab and 120 lb Doberman) who would wander the woods and often fight with each other. As with most folks of color (a rumor mind you) - the neighbors were ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED of the dogs, especially when they'd see the dogs fight each other. This was typically over scraps they threw out.

The neighbors house was also on the way to/from work. One day - I was coming home from school and the dogs were fighting in their yard. My mother - all 100 lbs of her - jumped out of the car and grabbed these dogs, yanked them apart, and started beating the snot out of them. All the while the neighbors were on top of their cars and had run into the house.

About a week later - one of the older neighbor kids was talking to me and said, your mama is a bad ass white woman
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
She stood there. Pointed a finger at me and laughed at me. That damn bitch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Poop shit, shit and poop. I'm mildly angry now.
Appreciate 1
      05-02-2016, 11:51 PM   #526
bimmette
YouTube.com/TvTara
bimmette's Avatar
Canada
6453
Rep
4,715
Posts

Drives: like I stole it! (11 m3 E93)
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Vancouver

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by iron_man
Do black guys not like when black girls date a white guy?
Good question.
Appreciate 0
      05-03-2016, 12:12 AM   #527
Taskmaster
Banned
Japan
2465
Rep
9,004
Posts

Drives: M235i 6MT / E92 328 Msport 6MT
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Florida

iTrader: (6)

Quote:
Originally Posted by iron_man View Post
Do black guys not like when black girls date a white guy?
I don't care, people can do whatever they want.

Larger story to go with* this, but I'm on my phone.

Last edited by Taskmaster; 05-03-2016 at 12:42 AM..
Appreciate 0
      05-03-2016, 12:35 AM   #528
kprocivic
Lieutenant Colonel
kprocivic's Avatar
813
Rep
1,575
Posts

Drives: ecoboost s to the t
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: 92346

iTrader: (7)

Quote:
Originally Posted by iron_man View Post
Do black guys not like when black girls date a white guy?
Generally guys don't care, but black women, oh yea, they aren't to fond of that.
Appreciate 2
Post Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
black, frederick douglas, freedom, hre wheels, ithoughtphoebewasmixed, mybestfriendisblack, popeyes chicken, purpledrank, verbiage speaks so well, whatwouldcarltondo, whitepeopleinvitedtothecookout


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:29 PM.




m5post
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST