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The AUX in level is fixed. No adaptor or anything else can do anything about that. HOWEVER: The line out level of the iPod is way stronger than the max out of the headphone out. If you use any adaptor for the dock out, you should be fine (I use sik). Any controls there (like on the belkin) only reduce the sound output volume, they are not amplifiers, so you don't need them. The BMW volume control should suffice.
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