This topic is a tad old, but this photo might be helpful:
While it's pretty obvious if you were looking at this on your own radio, this photo is upside-down. Also notice the position of the connector. In my case, there are 2 groups of 12 pins. This is the E46 AUX input kit (P/N: 82110149389) who's connector has 10 positions.
Note the position of the connector & how there are 2 exposed pins on the left side.
blue/white: pin 3
red/white: pin 4
brown/white: pin 10