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I didn't read all of it because it sounds like you just went to a shitty dealer. I live in PHX too, and I know all the dealers and my experience has been;

BMW North Scottsdale : Douchebags because they're penske, never buy from PAG. Only the Ferrari dealer treats you like a human. The Porsche dealer is easily the worst I've ever worked with.

Chapman BMW in central PHX - I have friends who work here so I always get treated well.

Chapman BMW in Chandler - They don't really get many allocations of the M cars it seems.

Arrowhead BMW - I got my M5 CS for MSRP. They always treat me well and bend over backwards for all my absurd requests. Secondary cat delete installed on my M5CS? Sure no problem. Full concierge service with one armor to get the entire thing PPF'd and Ceramic coated? Yup.

Victory BMW in Chandler/Gilbert - Unknown. Are these the guys that were screwing with you? Why would you protect their name?

I hated porsche dealers but it was really just Porsche north scottsdale being complete assholes. Never try to get a turbo S allocation from them, they'll screw around with you for years and never sell you one.